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I am now back from New York City. Actually, I got back last week, but I got so busy that I did not get the chance to sit and put down any thoughts. Now I find myself sitting in the meeting hall here on Salem Ave. and in the quite of the day, before any construction begins, I wanted to just take a few moments and journal some thoughts that I took from the conference that I attended.
First, I thought that the information I received was great practical stuff. It was delivered in an excellent format which, while there was product to buy, did not feel like a commercial. Second, the time with the other church planters that I went with was great. It is cool to know that I am not alone in the struggles that I face. Sitting in a room with men and women who have to different degrees been through the same stuff in really cool. There is a certain sense of brotherhood that you cannot help but feel.
Third, and most important, was the sense of seriousness I walked away from the conference with. As I listened to the speakers, my mind went to the group of people that want to call LIFEhouse West their home. They want to be a part of the launch team that is planting this church. I guess the part that struck me is that I now have a "flock". I know that is a silly church word, but it applies. God has given me a group of people that I am responsible for. That is neither bad nor sacry. It is good, in fact, it is a very humbling, marvelous, and beautiful thing. to take a group of people and work to see them grow in their relationship with God, to spiritually father (or mother in my wife's case) others is an honor that we do not deserve. I am grateful for the opportunity that has been afforded to Cindy and I.
Another sense that I get is that for me, the challenge is to always make sure that my life lines up. That what I tell others to do, I am doing. The "call" of God, if I use that term for a moment, to vocational ministry is very serious. I think that sometimes people think that it is just going to lunches, counseling, and sitting with other pastors and goofing off. Everyone forgets that you have to deal with people in some of the hardest (and yes joyful also) circumstances that they face. At that moment, whatever things you say or do, ring hollow if your life is not lived with integrity. Now this is not meant to be a pitty me statement, I cannot imagine myself doing anything other than what God has me doing. I love it.
What I am trying to say, is that for me, I feel a strong sense that I live under a microscope and I also live my life for the betterment of others. The call to serve means a life of inconvienence. A life of sacrifice. There may be other paths along the way which seem easier as this call is processed, they must be avoided. They lead to a weakening of our testimony to others. Part of this call is more of God dealing with my junk than it sometimes is God using me to deal with other people's junk. I have to be willing to, with God's help root out anything that keeps me from not confronting my issued and working to be a better follower of Jesus. What a strange and yet wonderful journey God is taking me on. I trust that as you read my random musing, that you too are compelled to look inside and see what God wants to change. Let him do what he does and enjoy the process.
PJ
First, I thought that the information I received was great practical stuff. It was delivered in an excellent format which, while there was product to buy, did not feel like a commercial. Second, the time with the other church planters that I went with was great. It is cool to know that I am not alone in the struggles that I face. Sitting in a room with men and women who have to different degrees been through the same stuff in really cool. There is a certain sense of brotherhood that you cannot help but feel.
Third, and most important, was the sense of seriousness I walked away from the conference with. As I listened to the speakers, my mind went to the group of people that want to call LIFEhouse West their home. They want to be a part of the launch team that is planting this church. I guess the part that struck me is that I now have a "flock". I know that is a silly church word, but it applies. God has given me a group of people that I am responsible for. That is neither bad nor sacry. It is good, in fact, it is a very humbling, marvelous, and beautiful thing. to take a group of people and work to see them grow in their relationship with God, to spiritually father (or mother in my wife's case) others is an honor that we do not deserve. I am grateful for the opportunity that has been afforded to Cindy and I.
Another sense that I get is that for me, the challenge is to always make sure that my life lines up. That what I tell others to do, I am doing. The "call" of God, if I use that term for a moment, to vocational ministry is very serious. I think that sometimes people think that it is just going to lunches, counseling, and sitting with other pastors and goofing off. Everyone forgets that you have to deal with people in some of the hardest (and yes joyful also) circumstances that they face. At that moment, whatever things you say or do, ring hollow if your life is not lived with integrity. Now this is not meant to be a pitty me statement, I cannot imagine myself doing anything other than what God has me doing. I love it.
What I am trying to say, is that for me, I feel a strong sense that I live under a microscope and I also live my life for the betterment of others. The call to serve means a life of inconvienence. A life of sacrifice. There may be other paths along the way which seem easier as this call is processed, they must be avoided. They lead to a weakening of our testimony to others. Part of this call is more of God dealing with my junk than it sometimes is God using me to deal with other people's junk. I have to be willing to, with God's help root out anything that keeps me from not confronting my issued and working to be a better follower of Jesus. What a strange and yet wonderful journey God is taking me on. I trust that as you read my random musing, that you too are compelled to look inside and see what God wants to change. Let him do what he does and enjoy the process.
PJ
posted by PJ | 12:37 PM
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